Small Town to Big Stages: Ashleys Journey to the Inman Connect Stage

The other thing I said, which I don't think I said on stage, but we talked about afterwards, is that I don't like to have a transaction die in my hands. So by that, you know, if we're in just an offer and we're going back and forth and something might be rejected, and then again, like, it doesn't necessarily. Just because it was rejected in my head doesn't mean we're or over. I mean, sure, the seller might think that, but I'm going to come back with something else that might be more advantageous to them. And I just had that happen like three weeks ago though. Seller rejected. And you know, the other agent was like, sorry, Ashley. And I was like, went back to the buyer. I'm like, wow, they didn't like that. I wish they would have counter, but they didn't. So let's try to make it a little bit better. And lo and behold, we got an accepted offer, you know, so I think that just trying to make sure that you keep on going because at the end of the day, if we remember what everyone's trying to get there for, you just have to keep on peeling away the layers of the onion to get to what. Welcome to the Leading Lane podcast for Real Estate Pros by Real Estate Pros with your hosts, Ashley Frederick and Steven Burch. If you're looking for an honest, authentic and raw perspective, you found it. Welcome to the Leading Lane podcast. I'm excited for this episode because we have some great adventures that we, we just caught back from before. We really dive into the experience of going to New York City to Inman Connect and having Ashley on stage. I really want to talk about like what kind of led up to the invitation of you going to Inman and what all happened there. So we can talk about like manifestation and putting into the universe and these positive thoughts and then we can go into the experience. Are you good with that? Sure. Okay, cool. I know you love the, the spotlight on. On this type of stuff. I love it. Well, I think it goes back to Stephen's mantra for the year, which is akuta matata. And you know, we were in a poolside talking about things that we want to happen in 2025. So I think that was on a Thursday and I threw out just wanting to be on more stages and you know, that always looks different for me, I think maybe than what I think so going to be and what it's going to be. But for me, I guess I just want to, you know, share life experiences. I want to try to Inspire other people, you know, small town USA girl, right here. Like, you know, to show people that you can be from anywhere and you can make a difference. So that was a Thursday, and on Friday I got an email from our friend Keith at nexthome and said that they had an opportunity to be a guest speaker on a panel and they thought that I would be a perfect fit for it. So of course, you know, there's like the hot minute of like, why would they pick me? Like, I shouldn't be on stage, like, I'm not going to do that. And then you have to reel it back for yourself and be like, nope, like I'm going to make this happen. For me, at that point, it was just a little bit of timing. My husband was having a major surgery like two days before the speaking event. So I just asked them to give me some time for logistics and I figured it out so that I would be able to fly and make a real fast 48 turnout, 48 hour turnaround. So their Thursday after Wednesday afternoon, spoke Thursday out Friday morning. But it was a great opportunity. Super thankful that Steven was able to join me as well. But you know, there's so many different aspects of what happened in that short amount of time I'm very grateful for. I think, you know, probably starting was we were able to get together happy hour and dinner with some other friends of ours that live on the east coast. And I think for me it's just, you know, these aren't people that you get to see every day. These aren't people. I mean, some people we had met for the very first time, but maybe follow our podcast, follow us. But like, the sheer excitement from other people for you is just something that is, you know, nice to embody, I guess, if you will. And I think it gives you that extra push that there are people that truly are rooting for you, you know, throughout the U.S. it's not just at home or it's not just your closest friends. So that for me was just very like uplifting to have prior to doing that. Right. And you know, I, I think with going there, like, I was like, oh man, we're gonna go to a happy hour. Like, it's cool. But in, you know, obviously the CEO James Doiggins was, was there and you know, he was the, the star, if you will. But really they're there. Like every single person that was there was coming up to you and super excited for you. And you know, I think as the night progresses, those deeper conversations that we were having, especially at dinner, which I'm that freaking bread at that restaurant. The butter? Yeah, bread and the butter and then the, the leeks and I mean, it was just fantastic, but just like, how. The butter just so you know, it was like a foot tall and like, I'm from a dairy state and there's still a lot of butter. I can't lie. I actually thought it was ice cream at first. I was like, why are they bringing that out? Like, and they just, like, scooped it out of that big old ice cream container and just popped it on the food report. And I was like, holy hell. Like, what is this? I think that's the first time my, my mouth was, like, open of, like in awe of the presentation at a restaurant like that. But anyhow, the, you know, like, as the conversations, you know, got more in depth and, you know, there's people that were coming up to you. How does that make you that they're. They're making comments about watching your. Your journey, listening to the podcast or just different things that you have done has inspired them and how that has impacted their lives. How does that make you feel in the moment and then the overall feel of it as well? You know, I think in the moment, it's still always a little bit like, not like an ick, but like a, you know, like, I don't know how to put that into words, but I think sometimes it's hard for us to see ourselves as others see. So, you know, for me, I'm just doing what I enjoy doing, and I forget that it's maybe not common, you know, to have these opportunities or whatnot. So, you know, I've. I've worked really hard on saying thank you because I think in the past, it used to be, you know, like, I'm not good enough, or, oh, I'm sure I'll mess up or something like that. And, you know, that's not. That's not really fair for them either, to hear that. So. I've worked really hard on the thank yous and the appreciation of, you know, people supporting other people, because for a long time in my career, that wasn't the case. You know, we still have issues today, you know, people that come across and aren't happy for you and try to tear you down. And, you know, it can get easy to fall into that trap unless you have those people that are excited for you and will tell you those things. So for me, I think I've realized that it is. It is important to get out of the fishbowl. So, I mean, we had that conversation numerous Times. So when you're standing at the top of Empire State Building and you're looking at like, over, like thousands of skyscrapers, right. I'm pretty sure that yours and my town could both each fit into their own skyscraper. It is a little bit just like, humbling of realizing, like, we are just these like, itty little bitty people and we come from these itty little bitty fishbowls. And then you're in the city where there's like a million people. Right. And I think sometimes when you look at it from that, you know, aspect, it is pretty cool that we're just coming from these little areas and we can go make impacts in other areas. But it's just been a mindset for me differently when things here, like, I had a situation here a couple weeks ago and I got upset about it, and then I was like, you know what? Like, this is, this is the fishbowls situation. I'm just gonna back away. They can do whatever they want, and I'm gonna focus up here in the ocean. And I think the more that we can focus on the possibilities that are available in the ocean, the more people, you know, will be able to impact. Absolutely. And. And I think you're, you're so right on that aspect of, like, up there. And I think we even both kind of said it. Like you were like, it's so peaceful up here on top of the Empire State Building and it's so calm. And then you're looking at, down at these other buildings and, you know, across the, the sky view there, and you're like, man, I'm so small. And for me, it was almost this, like. I don't know how to necessarily describe it. Like, I think I've always had this, like, being small town America, you know, everybody's looking at me constantly. Nobody knew who I was there. Nobody, you know, like, was necessarily, you know, watching what we were doing or anything else. Like, and it was almost this, like, relief of I don't have to constantly be on this, you know, on the stage or on the spotlight. And it was refreshing to be able to stand up there and say, man, if I'm able to, to do this from small town America, and this is how far we have come, imagine what's going to happen when we continue to do these different opportunities and take advantage of these things and open our ourselves up to different stages. So it's very surreal, like, sitting on top of the Empire State Building, right, And looking at all of these buildings and all these people. And honestly, I think we Said it looked really fake, but it was peaceful up there. And you know, for me it was almost a relief because like it's, we're no longer in small town America. We no longer have all of these judging eyes and daggers being thrown at us like people are passing every single day as far as, you know, the hustle and bustle in the city and side note, would never want to live there and that's okay. But you know, we, yeah, for sure. But it was so like a relief of man, if we are able to impact people like we have so far and you know, we had and this is my limitations that I'm from small town America so I can't have a wide reach of an impact. It's only, you know, on a local level, but that's not true. And I think it was very eye opening for me at least of being able to say we need to be, you know, stepping outside that small fishbowl and getting into the ocean and taking on those different opportunities of let it be going to different conferences, let it be getting on stages, physical stages or, or just getting into different rooms of yes, like minded people. But it doesn't mean that you all have to have the same exact opinions about everything but just making sure that you're with the people that are looking for that success and driving forward and cheering you on, you know. So I think for me it was just like a great experience sitting from the back, watching you have this experience of just realizing we are making an impact. We, we keep on putting more content out there, having more conversations, taking, making ourselves available for more opportunities. And I think the more that we are continuing to put that out into the universe, it just seems that just like from that, that time in the pool, we now are going to be open to more opportunities coming back to us because we are putting into the universe. I appreciate what you say about, you know, doing new conferences like I've never been to Inman. I don't think you have either, you know, and I think it's just, it's good to go to different things that you wouldn't normally hear. Right. Because we can go to our conferences and it's kind of the, you know, pattern, if you will. So you know, for me I was interested in how much they talked about AI, which, you know, we talk about a lot. But I think hearing it from people that are doing it all day and every day and what that might look like in the future was interesting. But also, you know, like listening to James and Mauricio debate clear cooperation policy which that's probably a great topic for us to have on a podcast in the near future, you know, and even one of the. They had, like, the audience take a poll when you were there. Are you. For clear cooperation? Are you not? And do you not know what I'm talking about? And I think there was, like, 5 to 8% of people that didn't know what he was talking about. And, like, that's concerning to me. Like, it's a huge deal. So I think it shows how much education still needs to be done on. On the forefront of what's going on in real estate. I. I appreciated that we didn't spend a lot of time on the lawsuit, because I think you and I can agree, like, we've kind of beat that, like, out of everyone, like, it is what it is at this point in time. We've all made our changes, still have some stupid things to deal with. It's nice to focus on something a little bit different than that. But, you know, everybody in general was so kind. And, you know, my sister used to live in New York City. And you hear people that will say about how abrupt they are and whatnot. And I'll be honest, I felt safe the whole entire time. I thought that people were extremely kind. You know, a shout out to Noble Black, who was the other panelist on. On ours. And, you know, it was funny to just kind of reference, you know, and this is also, like, where you, you know, like, we're all doing real estate things, but we live such different lives. Like, I think my. I said our average sale price is like 225, which I think the most expensive house I've sold was like, 1.2 million. And then he said is currently highest listed was like 120 million was the listing. And I was like, we're gonna have to work for years, you know, So I think it's just a. But on the flip side, right, like, then me talking to him and like, I said that I do 90 transactions a year. He was like, oh, my God, I don't know how you do that, you know, so it's so different how, like, in the past, I maybe would have looked at someone that says they sell $120 million homes and been like, we're not one in the same. But yet here he's saying, like, he probably only has to do, I mean, like, one, but, like, 10 transactions a year, right? Or like, I'm doing 90 to make up for it. So I think that it was this appreciation that we might be from different aspects of life and doing things very differently. But we are both very well in tuned with how real estate works, how you treat your clients, what's good for them. So I appreciated that. And you know, I think the other part that I encourage, I think we talk about this too, is after the presentation, I think was very special or important to me. You know, a couple people came up afterwards, you and I, you know, sat at the bar afterwards and had people come up. And I think that there's a lost art of just saying good job to someone or asking them more information. So I think that that was really nice for me was that just random strangers came up and said, you know, great job. And I think, as you know, I talked about, like, it just makes it a little bit easier to do next time or realize that the information that you are sharing is actually registering with people and giving people a way to think about things differently. And I will say that I also credited the podcast. You know, we've been doing this for a year and I think that both you and I, it gives us confidence in speaking on the fly because we literally hop on a call and we're like, what are we going to talk about today? And then we roll with it and how much I think my speaking has improved. The ums, the likes, the spaces, shakiness, all of that I felt, you know, has gone away. We should have access to some of the replays. So we'll be excited to share that with everyone. But yeah, all around. It was short, but it was great. You know, great conversations throughout and just reaffirming that what we're doing is, is the right thing. And, you know, I think you hit something that maybe needs to be unpacked a little bit more. As far as you. And what was the other gentleman's name on the panel with you? Noble. Noble. Noble. It doesn't matter the number of units or the amount of sales volume, and it doesn't matter where you live this industry and really in life in general, it's about people. And if you treat people well and you have your boundaries and you, you're truly, you know, leading from the heart and coming from a caring place, really, that's where I think that a lot of people miss the understanding of how you grow a business, how you grow as an individual when, when you have the commission breath and you're so focused on the, the transactional side of things and not there truly for the people to people like you're, you're not in it for the right reasons. So therefore I think it's going to be way more difficult to actually grow. Let again that be from an individual personal development or on a professional development business side, transactional. So with that, like your guys's conversation that your topic was getting to yes, right? Like in negotiations to get to yes. And I'm going to kind of talk out the other side of my mouth on this because I think it is important when you go on on stage and you're in front of people that you have these data points of references and making sure that you on the stage, you know, next to somebody else or multiple people, it doesn't matter. But even to your audience, they understand where you are coming from. And again, it doesn't matter necessarily if it's the one transaction or the 90 or the 120 million or the 220,000. Getting the. It's setting the stage for your audience and for the other panelists for a common ground of understanding that, hey, we're here, we're successful, but the now let's unpack the truth of how to be able to get to yes. So can we talk about some of the questions that you were asked on stage on being able to get there? And I have those on the, on the notes if we need to pull them up. But really the negotiation was the main highlight, right? What were your, your high points that you had you guys talked about on, on stage in Inman, I think one. Of the biggest things is communication, right. I think that we for how things can go awry so quickly when there is a break in communication. So it's really a matter of education and communication with our clients. So if we're giving them the right information, you know, and I think I talked about setting expectations from the beginning, right. So having a solid buyer consult or seller consult and this is what the process looks like, we might encounter this down the road. So when we do encounter those problems down the road, they're less likely to be a hiccup because I already said this might come up down the road, you know, and I think Noble made a good point of just you have to be confident in your approach because seller or buyer can sniff out someone very quickly that maybe isn't confident and it comes with time. Right. And maybe that's when you still need a mentor to help you through those things. But if you're not confident in what you're saying and what you're doing, the other person's going to pick up on it very quickly. And I think that that goes along with one of the things we talked about. I believe it said was like, what's a mistake that agents make in negotiations? What's one of the biggest mistakes? And I said, they become so defensive so quickly. I always try to remind agents, you know, you gotta. Like. So I think we talked about that too. So one, like, you become defensive. The other piece of that is, I know a lot of these agents portray those feelings onto their clients. So they might call and be like, you're never going to believe what the buyer just asked for. You know, and we need to get rid of that. And it could just be like, so, you know, buyer came back with a couple requests, nothing that we can't work through. Like, which one do you think is going to be handled better by the seller? So I think, you know, being. You're supposed to be the calm, the professional one, right? So remembering that. But what I did say is sometimes we all need to pause and it might get heated. And you know what? Not. I think that it's a matter of being like, you know what? I think we should just take a break for a minute. I've had to do this with clients. I mean, I remember one was swearing at me, and I was like, you know what? I'm gonna. I'm just gonna hang up right now. I'm not hanging up on you. I'm just telling you that we need to take a break. Right. I think it was like an hour later he called, apologizing. Right. But if we would have let that continue for hours, nothing would have got accomplished. But I also think, and I've done this before, especially when you're talking to another agent, and it's such a blank question that you'll catch them off guard, but it's like, are you okay? Because there's probably something else going on somewhere in their lives. I remember that help that happened with an agent. She was being very unkind on the call. And she can be. But I just remember being like. Like, are you okay? Because this is not normal in here. Right? Like, I think her. Her brother was going in for surgery for something, right? And so we forget that everyone's running their lives with their families and their children and these mishaps, and then all that comes into a transaction, and we got to remember to keep that line, like, separated so we can all move towards the goal. And so one of the things, too, that I think that you really honed into, and I thought it was funny because the question was something to the effect of, like, how do you know when it's time to call it quits? And you know, to, to end it elegantly with, you know, your, your buyer, sellers and the transaction. So what, what was your, your answer to that question? Well, my first answer was I don't like to take no for an answer. So. Right. Keith was, he was the one that was up there, you know, asking the questions, and he was like, I know you, you do not know for an answer. We get it. Right. Like, because, yeah, you had to deal with me. So, you know, and I think that there's a couple parts that go with that. But I've talked about there, there is an art of problem solving. Right. So that's part of the not taking no and no for an answer. Because, and I'll be honest, sometimes it doesn't work. But nine times out of 10, there's probably a solution in there somewhere. We just have to weed through the messes to get to that, you know, And I talked about too, how, especially if you're, if you're working with a newer agent, they maybe haven't had that situation before. So instead of them just being like, well, nope, the lender said they can't do this, I would come back and be like, sure, I understand that, that lender can't do that, but did you try this lender? I know that this lender has been able to do that. Well, they didn't know that they called that lender. Lo and behold, we saved the transaction, you know, So I think that you just have to be able to problem solve. And I think that a lot of people are just very easy to give up. The other thing I said, which I don't think I said on stage, but we talked about afterwards, is that I don't like to have a transaction die in my hands. So by that, you know, if we're in just an offer and we're going back and forth and something might be rejected, and then again, like, it doesn't necessarily. Just because it was rejected in my head doesn't mean we're or over. I mean, sure, the seller might think that, but I'm going to come back with something else that might be more advantageous to them. And I just had that happen like three weeks ago. The seller rejected. And you know, the other agent was like, sorry, Ashley. And I was like, I went back to the buyer. I'm like, ah, they didn't like that. I wish they would have counter, but they didn't. So let's try to make it a little bit better. And lo and behold, we got an accepted offer, you know, so I think that just Trying to make sure that you keep on going. Because at the end of the day, if we remember what everyone's trying to get there for, you just have to keep on peeling away the layers of the onion to get to what you want. Right. And, you know, I think it's so interesting that it loops back to where when you started on this conversation is that it goes back to education and communication. And right there, you not only just education communication to the other agent, but also to the client that you're serving. So I think that the reason why you, one of the many reasons why you are so successful at what you do is because you have those true honest conversations, education consults right up front, and you're constantly educating and communicating to your client throughout the journey of that transaction. So therefore you don't have many as many transactions that fall out, and therefore you don't have that many clients that you have to end, you know, the. Their relationship because you've already established expectations right up front. And if they're not willing to meet those or come to the table with those expectations, you're not willing to move forward with that client. So it's almost like you are safeguarding not only yourself and I mean in the transaction right up front, but you're even going back to the boundaries and your mental health. Like you don't want to enter a relationship with somebody to then go into an under contract for a transaction and then that drama and trauma, you know, flows over into that and blows up like you're already establishing clear expectations and articulating up front for them to go into this journey well versed on exactly what's going on. So I, I think that that's just something that we, you know, I wish we would have hit on a little bit more on stage of like, understanding that it's not just let me hurry up and sign that buyer agency and let me hurry up and get you under contract. It's truly being there and being the advocate for them and sometimes being the advocate for them, or you may not be the correct advocate for them because you guys are not aligning and that's okay. So it's almost like you'd rather, I don't want to say lose the transaction upfront, but you're not signing anybody, so therefore you're not losing anything. So that makes sense, you know. Yeah, I think that it's a matter of recognizing your boundaries. And I think, you know, Noble made a comment to that about, I think a lady that I don't remember, he had shown her like, tons and tons of properties. And they just, you know, unrealistic expectations, you know. And he decided, you know, to just tell her that it wasn't a good fit. And I think he said it was like four years later and it was a listing of. Of his and, like, that that buyer was looking at a listing of his with another agent. So, like. Right. He realized, like, that would have been four years worth of someone that still just wasn't ready to commit. You know, even, like last week, I. I had a. You know, when you travel, it makes your schedule a little bit difficult. There was a lady that was very adamant about a specific time on Monday that she wanted to meet. Like, I just. I couldn't. I already had prearranged appointments. I think she had, you know, called and texted and emailed, like, every single day. If I didn't respond within, like, five minutes, it was another email or a text message. And great for me and my mental health, like, that doesn't work. Doesn't work well for me. And so for me, it was. I referred it to another agent in our office that can be more flexible or might have more time available. And, you know, they were under contract. Right. So it's a matter of, like, realizing again, like, that's just not a good fit for me right now. But there's another agent that's eager and we'll have that time available on Monday. And we still worked for the client. Right. Like, she still got what she needed and everybody's happy at the end of the day. So I think, you know, I talked about it on stage, but especially for new agents, I think it's really hard to give up a client because, like, you're looking for your first paycheck. It is what it is, right? To get into that routine. Like, we're at. We're at a place in our lives where we can refer someone out if it doesn't make sense. But I try to tell those new agents, again, you have to be mindful of how people are talking to and if they're being rude. And, you know, I think we talked about a couple episodes ago, like, it's okay, like, to break that because I guarantee you that someone right behind them is going to worship the ground you walk on. They're going to be your client for life. And we just have to remember that we are not at everyone's backing call as much as they like to portray that. I mean, there's realistic things in life that just can't make it happen. And with that, not only the. That's how the clients like to portray that. But that's how I mean, I felt when I first started that I had to be at the beck and call. And so I know that we talk about that multiple times and over and over. And it's just, I think it's great to be able to hear that no matter what conference we go to or where we're at, you know, these different topics that we are continuously talking about, it's almost like I don't know if it's that I'm more aware of these topics and there it's being talked about other places as well. And I think that, you know, one of the other podcasts I want to do and talk about is, you know, mental health and again, on, you know, high producing people, those who that are constantly out there and how actually strenuous it is on your, your personal side. So I think it's so important to continue these messages and conversations, having them all over the place and not just making everything so transact. So any, any last things that you would like to throw out there? Just that I'm extremely humbled by the experience. It was, I'll be honest, you know, I shared it with Keith too. I mean, it wasn't in the right mindset that time of year. And it's just funny how reaching out, right? And for them it was nothing. It was just like, hey, let's get Ashley on stage. But how much that changed my mindset to tackle the year. And it was a reaffirmation of I can do scary things, I can do what I want to do, I can be on stages, I deserve to be on stages. I've worked for that. So, you know, it's funny how just one simple email can change the trajectory of someone's year or month or, you know, life, if you will, because it opens up other doors. So just very humbled and very grateful. I'm very thankful for the following, that we have the support again. I hope people realize that all the messages that they send, looked at, received and keep us, you know, going, but that I think both you and I are, are grateful for the opportunity and look forward to more opportunities to, to speak with people. You know, it was interesting and I think I told you, but on Tuesday morning, I had a lender that came up to me and he's like, I was at my conference in Florida, they said they're looking for speakers. And I was like, oh, my friend Ashley said she wants to be on more stages. So I think you're going to come to Florida next year. So it was just kind of funny. You have to put it on. And we got an email from an association, right, asking us about CES and being able to come up and do different trainings. And so I think it's scary. Scary shit, right? Like, it's scary to get out there doing something new. But I'm so proud of you for jumping on that opportunity and, you know, especially with everything that you had on the personal side with Ben going through surgery and, you know, kudos to him for saying no go, right? Like, and your sister stepping up to be able to come up and help, you know, your team being able to. To manage, holding down the fort. Like, I think how much you have worked and everything, you know, has led up to this, to be able to open or allow you to take these opportunities. And everybody's cheering you on. So kudos to you. Congrats. And I'm excited to see what else this opportunity presents. You know, I think there's so much,. You know, so I'm so glad you were able to be there. Yeah, absolutely. Cool. Well, thank you for tuning in for the Leading Lane podcast. If you have would like to be a guest, please let us know. If there's any specific questions you want us to answer, please reach out to us. We'll be more than happy to talk about it. If you've enjoyed today's episode, please, like, subscribe and share with others. Stay connected. For more genuine insights and strategies to boost your real estate career on Facebook or check out our website. We'll see you next time.